Archive for November 2011

No Pants Sighting of the Day

November 23, 2011

Location: Somewhere along BU’s campus, which is proving to be the second most pantsless place in New England. The first is Mohegan Sun in Uncasville, CT. A post describing this no pants purgatory will be forthcoming.

Offense: Must I review the rules of tights AGAIN?! They are not now, nor will they ever be, pants. This young woman fits the “stereotypical college girl” profile perfectly. North Face fleece, Vera Bradley clutch, leggings/tights, Uggs. It’s just too predictable. But on this clear, crisp, fall day, your panties, my dear, are on display.

Verdict: Listen, ladies, I realize you’re supposedly living on a student’s budget (which, let’s face it, I don’t believe for a second. You go to BU, and Mommy and Daddy drove their Range Rover up from the Cape to move you into your dorm.). But being a “poor” student doesn’t mean you have to skimp on pants. You were somehow accepted into a prestigious university, meaning you possess some level of intelligence. So take those smarts and instead of hitting the books to calculate EBIT and ROA, study up on pants. Instead of getting a fancy new piece of technology, get a full-length mirror. Then look in that mirror. Look at your ass specifically. If you cannot see a full view of your ass, recruit your roommate. That’s what college roommates are for. These four years will be some of the best of your life. Experience all BU has to offer…in pants.

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Photo courtesy of Emma, a pants-wearing BU student who can effectively distinguish between pants and this atrocity. Grade for this no-pants spy work = A+. Nice underwear pattern though...did you get that at Vicki's?

 

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