Archive for October 2011

Go With the Flow…Chart

October 1, 2011

In the years that I’ve been forging this no pants crusade, I have always stressed that my bottom line is not ridicule, but rather education. Ladies, if you do not wear clothes, I WILL take a picture of your ass. I will also publish that picture on the Internet. But never fear. Because I a.) will not show your face and b.) will only use it as a tool to educate the masses on the virtues of pants. Yet somehow, despite my tireless educational efforts, people are STILL without their pants. Luckily, five different people have recently drawn my attention to a very poignant schematic that outlines EXACTLY what I have been preaching all along.

This flow chart, entitled, “Am I Wearing Pants?”, is incredibly thorough and takes into consideration every possible scenario that girls of all ages may encounter. It’s a pocket-size pants monitor. The IQ of this single instrument allows anyone to take the brains out of the pants operation. It’s simply fool-proof. No individual effort required. X marks the spot pants treasure map. Need I make more puns? Humor me one more…and allow me to make it catchy…

If your lack of pants has you feeling low,

And you’re just so lost on where to go,

To the leggings you just must say “Hell no!”

And instead so simple just go with the flow!

…chart!

My appreciation goes out to the 5 friends who sent this my way. It is as if I had designed it myself.

%d bloggers like this: