“My Grandmother is Basically Blind…”

…is one of Lady Gaga’s reasons for – wait for it – not wearing pants. You may be asking yourself, “What do elderly women and visual impairment have to do with your refusal to don some lower appendage coverings?” Apparently, the answer is, everything. Now I want you to think for a moment about your own Grandma (or Nana, Gram Gram, Grammy…whatever variation on the theme you want), and honestly tell me if you would ever use her as an excuse to not wear pants. If anything, wouldn’t you put on some pants to prevent a potential heart attack or stroke for Grandma that your no-pants-slutty-self would inevitably cause? You might (I hope), but Lady Gaga clearly will not. She is under the delusional impression that Grandma is benefitting from her no-pants-ness. Did I mention the word delusional? Now I’ve held back the full quote from you for this entire paragraph, if nothing else but to mentally prepare you for what you’re about to read. Not only am I about to dump Lady Gaga’s Grandma quote on you, but you’re about to digest a whole truckload of excuses about her terrible pants track record. Enjoy. Judge. Laugh. I don’t really care what your reaction is. I do hope you put some pants on as a result.

“My grandmother is basically blind, but she can make out the lighter parts, like my skin and hair. She says, ‘I can see you, because you have no pants on.’ So I’ll continue to wear no pants so that my grandma can see me.” [OneSource Talent]

Comment: QUOI?????

“The singer was recently stopped by police in Chicago who had some objections to her hot pants. ‘I guess they weren’t really pants at all, but it was really funny because all you saw was this half-naked girl on the street yelling at some cop,’ she told the Daily Star, adding that she tried to reason with the officer. ‘It’s fashion! I’m an artist!’ ” [MTV]

“It’s not that I don’t like pants, I just choose not to wear them some days.” [Softpedia]

“I just don’t feel that it’s all that sexy. It’s weird. And uncomfortable. I look at photos of myself, and I look like such a tranny! It’s amazing! I look like Grace Jones, androgynous, robo, future fashion queen. It’s not what is sexy. It’s graphic, and it’s art. But that’s what’s funny: Well, yeah, I take my pants off, but does it matter if your pants are off if you’ve got eight-inch shoulder pads on, and a hood, and black lipstick and glasses with rocks on them? I don’t know. That’s sexy to me. But I don’t really think anybody’s d- is hard, looking at that. I think they’re just confused, and maybe a little scared.” [EW]

Well at least she has an explanation. She may be a crazy no-pants-wearing-freak, but at least she’s consciously thinking of the well-being of her Grandma, and the “art” of her fashion decisions. Maybe I should forward these quotes to my Grandma and Nana…they wouldn’t understand them in the slightest, but I want them to know that Lady Gaga will be there for them if they go blind. That means a lot, especially if they have the urge to wear a leotard in their 80s.

Explore posts in the same categories: Sans Pants

One Comment on ““My Grandmother is Basically Blind…””

  1. what a great site and informative posts, I will add a backlink and bookmark your site. Keep up the good work!

    Robert Shumake Fifth Third

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